Sunday, May 22, 2005

wah..long time no blog.. k la.. finally attachment end.. then school is starting.. first time in my life that i hope school faster start.. cos the work realyl not that nice.. now have to write out a 2000 words report to hand in.. SIAN!!..

k.. new term.. i wish .. same as last feww sem.. relax relax then let me pass alll.. then ar.. now alot of year one freshie.. some at toys r us is coming over.. hope to see them la.. then i check le.. i think my class gt 9 guys.. sian lor.. don noe so many guys for wat... hope more girls la.. cos i wan to be alone no more !!! hahah.. k la k la.. joking la ar..

hmmm.. don noe wat to write le.. think stop here.. school start then i write somemore ar..

roger lost his dreams 5/22/2005 10:37:00 PM

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Saturday, May 07, 2005

hm...veri long never blog.. cos been hit with the sunday working schedule.. attachment.. actually is useless and crappy lor.. work like a dog.. and getting paid like shit.. hahaha.. hope it end soon.. left 2 weeks only.. haha.. so far.. at there.. Toys r us.. fix bike n fix bike n fixx bike.. all ppl there tell me.. i am suay.. cos i kenna the section most tiring n hectic bla bla bla.. hah.. wat can i do.. but really rubbish la.. all i learn there nthign to do with my studies one.. fixing n changing light bulb... fixing bicycle.. link with business studies? i tdon think so.. maybe i shld change course be electrician better la.. crap !.. hope tis 2 weeks end fast..

this few wk.. download alot of j rock band concert.. like Dir en Grey... reignite my passion for them.. and really think.. i shld go back.. touch my bass.. n form a band.. haha.. at least..i am doing something i like !... nt like the TOYS R US attachment.. the more i work... the more sian i am.. hahah.. anyone want the jrock song ?? i can send !!!.. u wan i sing one.. also can.. i can record.. hahaha.. hmm.. think i be finding some ex band member n my cousin to meet up n jam.. see how it goes.. hope everything go smoothly...

basically..this may month.. sux to the core for me.. scedule is shit.. and i write everything from wat i don lk to wat i think of the attachment in the ITP booklet.. guess wat.. they take my booklet.. let ppl read.. haha.. FANTASTIC... and the person who i don like.. now noe how dulan i am with him !!! no wonder his attitude toward me change.. become better ? hahaha.. maybe shld just let them listen the lindsay lohan or wat... song.. STOP INTRUDING MY PRIVACY!!! haha...
then friday.. 6 may.. my grandma pass away.. she been taking care of me when i was young.. dote on me alot.. and i remember all the thing that she done for me.. however.. over the years..i nt that close to her.. i visit her veri seldom.. ever since she gt stroke... and ever since i was in upper secondary.. i spend time outside .. at home slping.. but i never visit her.. kind of regret.. she use to dote on me.. and yet.. i never really repay her back with wat i can.. sometime.. ppl shld just treasure with what they have around.. said wat u wan .. do wat u can when u are allow.. don wait.. i been tellign myself.. to wait wait wait.. then in the end.. i did nothing n now she is gone..

she's gone... am i sad?.. nt really.. cos i noe.. its a way for her to relieve off the pain.. she used to be active.. and not that thin.. love to cook and play some old ppl sport.. but she gt stroke.. she cant talk.. she cant walk.. and she cant express her self.. i remember.. when her heart stop that time.. we manage to save her back.. but.. her pain .. is just increasing.. now.. she thin.. due to the limitationg of food that she can eat.. and how she look like few years ago.. is totally different with how she look like.. she been hit with virus.. illness.... and lot of thing.. so i think.. to be gone in that way.. peacefully.. is good.. at least.. she is relieve of her pain.. and she go without much struggling n pain.. i pray for her in my heart.. hope she be with my grandpa up there..

the funeral.. will last till tues... finally day that i be able to see her.. till she is to be crement.. nothign i can do now that she will know.. i noe i nt that fillial.. i did not cry during the time when she was gone.... i will just pray..

-if tears can bring u back ..
i will cry for u.....
a river.. a sea..
whatever it take...
i will do it for u...

however.. its not that simple..
wats gone is gone..
i will never forget..
its alway in my mind..
the 19 years that u been with me..
to care and to cry for me..
if i ever have a choice..
i will not let u leave this way..
if i ever have a wish..
i will wish that u are here with me....

in memory of my belove grandma... Mdn Teo Kim Hong. ..

roger lost his dreams 5/07/2005 09:37:00 AM

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