Ow secret paradise...

2007-11-15T18:51:00.000+08:00

..if anyone still bother.. .i have shift.. to

http://rojiko.livejournal.com/

... yea.. if anyone still bother

2007-08-27T21:20:00.001+08:00

what do u call a job which u work for long hours. . work like a dog.. n gt no OT pay... its call .. NS

fxxk la.. i wan to ord

n thai song is nice !

2007-08-13T23:27:00.000+08:00

3 days long weekend is over.. i am feeling so sad.. so damn sian .. i don wan to go back camp .. haix.. i wan to kick soccer and rot every day.. darn bored this few wks.. anyone free enuff to go on a date with me ? lol .. i don date guys yo ~~ lol ~

2007-08-03T16:44:00.000+08:00

sian arr.... its august.. its another month ..national day is coming.. but.. do i gif a damn !?! no !!! wahahah.. having duty tat day.. i vounteer .. sian la... i wan to ord.. i wan to kick soccer .. i WAN TO JAMM!!!!!! haix... kicking soccer ytd.. now whole boday ache.. so sad... lol.. wondering if anyone still visit this blog lol

2007-07-26T22:50:00.001+08:00

i am so tire.. i am so sleepy.. but i just cant to slp.. cos i had taken a nap just now.. tml have to report back to camp at 6 am.. by right have to stay in.. i dint.. yes i stay out.. n i cheated the SAF.. but do i gif a damn ? no.. i don.. sian i wan to ord.. its so boring n tiring to serve the nation.. 700++ more km to my license.. yes i swear.. when i get my license .. the first place i gg to drive to is lavender to return comic.. after tat i gg to drive around singapore .. familiarize with all the road.. after tat every nite i gg to call my friend and ask them out for supper.. yes i gg to eat supper for 232 consecutive days and until i am fat lk a cow.. yes tats wat i gg to do after tat .. i going to go work or maybe study and still i going to call my friends and eat breakfast for 232 consecutive days .. then i going to kick soccer every 3 days for 300 consecutive weekes .......... ahh tats wat i call life.. do wat u wan , live how u wan , and relax lk no boady business...

so fast time flies.. i cannot believe i really in NS for 1 yrs+ ... its seem like ytd tat i gt long hair n colourful hair.. but now my hair is so short.. thats sux.. really sux.. n my life is so restricted.. somemore now a poly coursemate is my office thats so OMFG... can u imagine calling someone u see n same age as u as a SIR.. -.- i hate it.. seriously .. ARGH............ tml must go back drive n scare bird.. this is bored.. tis sux.. i hope i gt time to go n meet shihui wq and aw they all... veri long never see them.. long tiem no see wq.. don noe how is he.. don noe he still alive n kicking not.. especially aw.. donnoe he ok nt.. see they all smoke ... think all having unhealthy life style.. tats not gd.. haix.. SIAN!!!!! i wan to go out n SLACK !!!!!!}

- yes i am dead.. don look for me unless its impt

2007-07-21T15:37:00.000+08:00

after so long.. finally i blog.. one yr have pass. time pass so fast.. one year for wat?
nope.. not one yr r/s with a girl.. i am single n lonely..
nope.. not one yr in NS.. already pass it..
its one yr since my dad pass away.. time really pass veri fast.. when u never go count n think about it... time really pass away damn fast.. its seem like only a few week ago that he pass away.. but now .. suddenly.. its one year already.. been busy .. ytd n today to settle the one yr thing.. as chinese culture gt lots of thing to settle n deal with.. but then i been runnign up and down my hse to use my com.. rather to do the thing require.. so can be sae as quite free also bah..

guess u all can see bah.. finally that a tag board on my blog and gt song.. which u all can pause if u thik its noisy.. hmmm... alot thign happen since last blog.. especially to my firned wq.. realyl feel guilty.. both him n js is my friend.. but i donnoe why this still happen.. haix.. hopefully he can recover from it bah.. though life is not as pretty and beautiful as some sae.. but still i believe there is good thing in it bah.. hmmm. guess thats all i gt to sae for now bah... blog again soon.. hopefully i guess.. lol

-time really pass
treasure it as though every second is your last

2006-12-21T17:17:00.000+08:00

today is dec 21.. christmas is coming.. can u all feel the snow falling down from the sky ?? can u all see santa claus in toys r us buying toys ?? can u all see the rein deer running around in the zoo !!! its christmas.... did u all feel the atmosphere??? hoepfully no.. cos if u see the snow , santa and rein deer.. it mean something is wrong with u . so better not see...

christmas coming.. 4 more days... another year going to pass.. 2007 is coming.. being in the NS o6 months... alot thign happen.. now my home seem so empty.. lost one person.. is such a great different. nothing i can do but to move on. hmmm... so people.. do u all have christmas? and hope that it will come thru? i bet all people have.. but how often have the thing we wish really come thru ? i think its seldom that wat we wish will come thru... thats y its call a wish.. anyway.. hope all of u all have a happy christmas this time round...

been raining like mad this few day... i think if i put pails outsidce my house to collect water... i will have maybe,,,,3 days worth of water.. rain lk mad.. singapore also can flood.. this show how heavy the rain is.. rain lk mad.. wan to go out also hard... no wonder ppl call christmas day "white christmas" ... maybe is cause of the rain make until everything is white white..

now finally finish my driving course.. .. nothing to do.. alway eat n slp n rot.. getting fatter.. fat lk a cow now... haix.. realyl miss the day at NP n jamming.. so fun.. hopefulyl one day can meet up with my NP friend.. go out chit chat and rot again.. hence .. gain more weight.. n be like junyang.. (i noe onlyu read my blog. so i mention ur name) ... then rot rot rot... eat eat eat... fat fat fat.. haix.. life like so meaningless lehh... anyone gt idea to make my life feel colourful fun and enjoyable.. i will reward u handsomely with 3 pcs of tapioca cake.. but really life is so super bored.. cant find things to do.. and motivation to carry on.. haix !!!!!!

k bah.. blog till here.. see when .. uncle ow gt story then i blog bah....

- one day.. i will go plant up a pair of wing
soar high up into the sky
reach for the sun...
and be toast into a roast pigeon..

2006-10-03T22:04:00.000+08:00

.....surprise...surprise.. i finally blog.. after lk .. 4 months or wat ? ... ok la.. come back from tekong.. slp... or go out play... so lazy to blog.. now finally.. posted to unit.. become driver.. ok .. gt more time.. can blog.. but then.. do anyone realyl still visit this cemetry nt.. tats the qns.. hmmmm.. lets see.. next wk.. go for driving course.. drive drive drive.. 2 months minimun.. so will have lesser time... so now faster blog.. arbor later my blog kenna auto delete...

wat can i sae.. NS is really SUX.. b4 gg in i think it sux,... go in liao.. i still think... IT SUX.... to the core.. ok la.. go tekong.. same company with weiqi.. fated la.. go where also see him...lucky go unit different.. ppl now in sergeant course.. gt 3 sTRIPE one.. but training is xiong too.. i prefer relax relax.. happy go lucky better for me...

wat can i sae.. alot of thing happen durin gthis period... nope.. not the wat FROM BOY BECOME MAN thign that NS alway sae.. but i love someone important to me... yea..life is lk tat.. u will never know how much u treasure one person till the day u really lost him.. so ppl... better shower the ppl around you with lots of love before its too late and you start regreting...

my band.. donnoe how also.. one by one go in NS... memebrs not able to all coem out and jam thanks to the almight blaardy NS service.. but wat can i do .. grab this time to really buck up on myself lo.. i noe i nt the best bassist in spore.. no no.. not even the avg one... so must really buck up.. suddenly alot of band pop out.. lk watermelon band la... get some money band la... rei la... hellven la.. all suddenly pop out.. either can play well or really look well... thinks is due to the lucify effect la.. alot ppl get influence by them ... play jrock .. then all open to it.. willing to try now.. but still ppl.. pls stop saying that lucify start this jrock thing... this jrock band thing have been around since i in sec sch.. which is 4 5 yrs ago -.-... so stop saying that its lucifried who brought the thing call jrock to spore -.-

ok la.. currently.. adicted to buy n sell comic.. go chuangyi website n buy.. veri cheap.. go there sell no one wan to buy i donnoe y.. now comic getting more and more... so ppl if u wan to read comic come find me... but COME N READ.. not borrow home.. i scare liao.. alot comic go liao never come back i also don noe who took it la.. so no choice must be a bit bastard nowady.....

-do talent really play an important part in everything we do ?
i got no talent.. but i am willing to learn.. will i success...
can i really catch up with others and stop dragging aki u sei down ?
i have no choice.. but to ask HIM to teach me...
no matter wat the outcome.. bless me...

2006-04-26T21:59:00.000+08:00

i receive my enlistment letter on april fool day.. wat a good day to receive it.. hmmm .. receive le.. strange leh.. i don feel anything.. fear ? nt really.. happy ? comfirm nt.. jus throw the letter aside bah.. one month plus n i have to report to tekong.. maybe have to go to sch graduation with a botak head.. hmm.. nt a bad idea anyway...

i really hope to go ns fast.. at least i can go in n have free training tat comfirm will make me thin ba...

hmmm... so wat shld i sae leh.. nt in the best mood ? hmmm.. donnoe bah.. sad to sae.. another star have just fallen down from the sky again.. wats there to be shock about.. it happen during each stages of my life.. sec sch once.... b4 poly once.. during poly.. once.. wat can i sae.. suay? not really bah.. dononoe.. maybe the ppl up there just hate me.. nthing much i can sae also.. suan le bah .

hmm.. hopefully the jamming n the band will go well as its the only thing that really mean alot to me.. tats all bah....

2006-03-06T02:53:00.000+08:00

ok long time no blog.. finally .. exam finish.. so is my 3 years of studies in ngee ann.. provided i can pass for all my 3rd year paper .. hmm... time flies real fast.. 3 years .. just pass.. starting sae 3 yrs veri long.. now 3 years pass liao.. time to wait for enlistment letter and go to NS.. i shall not go into NS.. everyone talking bout NS and no doubt that it sux.. but.. what can i do.. just pack my bag and wait to get enlist.. so shall not go indepth bout it..

k .. now school end.. slack one more rest.. slp rest game... do all my stuff.. most important.. meet up with my band members.. jam more.. practice hard.. hopefully before i go into NS.. i am able to go perform or at least.. manage to play those song that we aim for.. so much thing happen.. good one bad one.. lots n lots.. life is lk tat.. either good thing or bad thing will fall on u .. no way somethign average will happen... hmmmm

lets see.. what have i been doing ... playing bass.. last week.. trying to study for exam.. now exam pass.. one leg step out of Ngee Ann.. wooo.. feel lk crying.. donnoe y.. maybe 3 yrs really will let people developed feeling bah.. not sure though.. hahah...

so now.. consider holiday start.. so wat i aim to do.. simple.. keep growing my hair.. see when i go into NS.. how long it is.. and of course ... so i can play with my hair when i am bored -.- ... next.. of course prac bass hard... jam more... i think i nd to get a job.. so i can buy lots of stuff... and take up lesson.....after tat can go out.. no nd take money from parents.. no see their mood... hmmm.. buy thing also no nd to think.. can just buy... somemore leh.. holiday ar.. slp more... watch more tv... try to play more game....

now adays.. the job so difficult to find.. i wanna find one job.. wash bowl one.. also cannot find...nearby here can liao.. also no nd pay veri high.. pay.. $5 more than enuff for me also.. then work.. 4 or 5 fdays can le.. no nd too much so i gt 2 days free to do my stuff.. hmmm.. yeapp.

oh ya.. everyday sae wan to form band.. in the end fail.. so i hope now this band can really make it.. my band ar.. name is Aki U Sei... mean.. sound of autumm... nice rite.. of course nice rite.. cos is not i think one also.. i wanted to call it Accuse.. don noe y.. sound lk tat .. then become lk tat.. but nt bad.. quite nice.. now ar the band.. gt 3 guys.. 1 girl.. the girl is singing.. nt bad.. sing still can.. then my drummer.. ppl sae he look cute.. play drum nt bad.. girl wan to noe him.. if wan.. just put a message on my tag board.. then my guitarist is my cousin.. japanese lk tat.. gold hair lk lion.. wan to noe him also can leavea msg on tag board.. oh ya.. anyone interested in jrock music.. interested and wan to play guitar one can tell me.. i recruiting a guitarist for my band.. nowaday... wan to find ppl play jrock song also diffcult.. haiz.. everything also difficult.. haiz...

ok enough of my band.. if u all wan to hear the song that we play.. leave msg too.. i will try to put there .. maybe listen liao ear pain nia.. ok.. hmmm... so lets see.. holiday wat more i wan to do... oh... i wan to go meet my sec sch friend.. pri sch friend.. n poly friends... go out walk walk eat eat.. lk all going NS ... must find time faster go out.. when we still have our hair.. if nt next tiem alll botak go out.. it aint fun -.-... its so sad.. ...

ok.. oh ya.. my classs... because of the money.. i think they quarrel.. seed money.. alamak.. gt xtra money.. just take lo.. all wanna take more or wat.. then quarrel.. zhen shi de... but i htink in the end ok le la.. so that still qutie gd.. poly 3 ys.. i still think my year one n two class suit me more..... but year 3 class.. veri outgoing... compare to the year 2 class.. year 3 one more outgoing.. go club la n stuff.. but i don club.. so i cant mix with thme.. but now graduate liao.. ok la.. poly 3 years.. quite happy also la.. noe new friend.. all types of ppl.. . gt those really make my life wonderful..... and gt those whose make me really wanna bang head... and also learn lots of new thing... see new thing... first time i saw gay... -.- ... some more same class.. actually gay also nt scary la.. as long as they their eye n hand to themself... ok i don noe wat i trying to blog also la.. stop here first.. maybe i tekong ocme out then i blog.... wahahah...

-love at first sight is like reading a book
the first time u see it.. u will be highly fascinated by the story..
u will wan to read more n noe more of the story..
u will hold the book to urself and hold it tight even when u are slping
when u are feeling down.. by looking at the cover page.. u will feel happy..

one months... two months... three months...
slowly day pass..
feeling start to fade and the word love no longer exist..
the book is like news paper....
even just by touching.. u will feel that it make ur hand dirty..
no matter how hard u look at it..
u will still think that there is nothign special about it...
it just a black n white paper with thing printed on it..
it is just something that u read to learn .. gain experience..
this is just part and parcel of life...

2006-02-07T18:17:00.000+08:00

when i am happy i am happy.. i will show it on my face...
when i am angry n piss off... i am angry n piss off.. i will show it on my face...
when i am sad i am sad... i will show it on my face..
when i think something is wrong .. i will just sae it ...
when i think i nd some comfirmation from someone.. i will ask for answer...
i do thing and ask qn at times.. is not because i am insensitive.. but just tat i wanna comfirm what i think is right...

u have your right not to said.. and i should your respect and not to ask you.. but don just assume that i know everything...
i don noe you.. just lk how much you have only noe of me...
u can have ur way at times... but sometime.. pls let me have my way....

i not being myself by not doig what i normally do and asking what i normally ask..
i am nt a guru.. i don noe wat you are thinking and what you are going to convey...

i can change for you.. but i won die for you..
don treat as a toy and be good to me when u like it ..
n don give a damn bout me when u don like it...
if you really think tat i am a toy..
then think twice..

i really hate you soemtime ..

2005-12-09T21:42:00.000+08:00

long time no blog.. year 3 already.. n it sux to the core.. i hate sch life.. its bored.. it sux..

this few months. lotsa of thing happen.. gd thing.. bad things .. all happen.. looking on the brighter side.. bad thing happen.. make me grow more mature.. gd thing happen.. brighten up my life..

how often in our life that we will find someone that we cherish.. or find a person that cherish us ? .. we only care about the person that we cherish .. forgetting the one that cherish.. always. . its only till that we have lost someone or something important, then we will try to look for it and feel the hurt that the loss of it have cost..

- the world spin for no one..
time tick off waiting for no one..
when we started to feel the different
and sense the loss..
it be too late..
we cant turn back time..
we cant find back the loss time..

cherish all the love one we have..
and cherish the time we have..

2005-10-16T19:15:00.000+08:00

Follow Me
Baby, I won't let you leave if you believe in me
And I always set you free from all those yesteryears
But you don't know how muchI got believe in you

I was staring at your shoulder shiveringIn such a coldest summer breeze
Meanwhile I wonder why we're here
Look for the line between love and friends
We'll be twisting ourselves again

I was standing at the corner on the street
Watching the wheels are turning free
Waiting to back up on my feet
Reading a line between night and day
I'll be twisting myself again

Music: BEAT CRUSADERS
Artist: ROCKET BOYS

2005-09-27T14:05:00.000+08:00

its the third wk.. n i really think . i going crazy.. all this stupid nightmare i been having... it just somehow killing me mentally.. yeah.. i think i am going to be mad anytime.. slpiing use to be my fav ... but now.. i just don dare to slp..

guys.. if u all like someone.. just do wat u can to win her heart.. don bother so much bout other things..just do wat u feel is rite.. and stop being stupid and gif the person u like to others..

third week an counting... how long it nd.. i don noe.. may it be .. one month.. 6 months.. or 1 year.. i be right here waiting for the day she is ok and willing to tok to me . . . . .

2005-09-14T13:58:00.000+08:00

i just did something stupid yesterday.. i tried to give up on my most impt dreams.. why do i feel so regret now.. izzit really cos i really cant let it go .. i donnoe.. wo shi zhen de fan bu liao shou . .

2005-09-12T12:45:00.000+08:00

.... ok .. 2 paper down.. one last one to go .. so wat if the 2 paper are down.. i going to fail it.. and i have not started on my last paper.. i think i am too lazy.. and too slack.. i really don noe wat to blog about.. and wat shld i blog.. sae wrong thing..also not good.. sae gd thing.. i don feel good..

don noe ar don noe.. i really don noe.. i just wanted to do wat i wan... live as i like.. and slack whenever i feel like.. i don noe.. sometime i hope i gt split personality.. one side of me will take in all the unhappy things.. and another side will take in all the happy stuiff.. like that.. i can dont think of all the bad things and stupid things.. and maybe.. the world may be a bit more nicer to live in.. ok ytd is sunday.. which i keep forgetting.. i work with wq to gif out flyer.. gif out about 2 k ? ... n now then i noe how singaporean is behaving.. now hten i noe.. flyer is like bomb.. they run at the sight of it.. come on la.. ask u all take.. take liao wan to throw away.. i don care.. but stop behaving like it will explode lor.. run so fast and so far.. but heng.. gt ppl take from me.. i hope they all strike lottery.. win 4D .. get the top prize in lucky draw..

ok now i can comfirm something.. i will hate the show mr fighting.. i just don noe why.. maybe the producer hate me ? or maybe i just sux at sunday midnite.. cos my luck is alway at the lowest at that time.. everytime quarrel or gt bad thing happen.. its on a sunday nite.. and of course i be the time i be watchign that stupid show.. what so good is that i just watch for the sake of watching.. i don lk the show.. i don lk the cast.. and i just switch to that channel.. and all the shit happen.. -.-... 5566.. wat did do to u in my previous life.. how coem the show now is like my nightmare.. dot dot dot.... and i don noe wats wrong with my hp.. it seem to alway convey the wrong msg to ppl.. i am not unhappy and etc.. and somehow.. ppl received it.. and will think that i am bad mood.. i am smiling while sending sms.. and they can think that i wan to quarrel.. eh.. maybe.. they shld abolish sms.. n let us use 3G.. see the face.. its better in that way.. trust me..

ok.. after mcom paper.. i do somethign stupid.. i bring someone to shi hui hse. then i din do anything.. and i wasted ppl time.. then ppl cannot revise mcom.. ok its my fault.. i admit.. but i was just trying to watch for the dog.. don let it run into the room lor.. ok la.. suan le.. lazy to sae.. treat it as an excuse or wateva.. i don noe wat to sae.. and i don feel liek saying.. whenever i start to do or sae soemthing.. pppl start scolding.. me.. ytd kenna twice.. thanks mr wq.. and that watchign 5566 show one ar.. fantastic.. i don noe why.. maybe i should considering.. useing thread to sew my mouth up.. think it will help greatly.... so what ppl have different mindset.. perception .. tihnking.. friends... and wateva.. cannot even try to mix around meh.. aiya.. i don noe la.. first time in my life.. the more i blog.. i more irritated i am.. the more pain my head is.. ok this is for real.. i hope later when i go out.. the lightenign strike me.. let me die in an instant.. then no worries.. yup.. that will be gd..

-no mood for anythign today -
- don wan to die pls don irritate me -

2005-09-03T03:55:00.000+08:00

ok i am back to write somemore.. i know u all will be shock.. suddenly.. the guy who only updates once every month.. start to blog almost once every 2 wks.. but trust me ppl.. it will not last too long. . .

k . finally ip is over.. i can RELAX awhile.. but the clever np big head principle decided to let us have the paper on next fri n sat.. golden weekeend.. fantastic idea.. and 2 paper in a row.. 2 difficult paper in a row.. yea.. gd idea.. wonder how he tot of that.. damn it.. so i have decided. take my time.. and start revision on mon.. also at the same time.. hope i can pass the paper..

thurs.. went to eat pastamania with wq.. order the tuna with bacon one.. which is one of the pasta dish that i tried to cook so hard.. and yet i fail miserably.. that is so irritating.. but nevertheless.. i manage ot steal some tips from the food there.. shall try cooking it and pass to otehrs to let them try.. after eating.. walk round then i go PS buy my stuff.. finally i go PS n get my stuff.. then i go star buck with them to drink.. n i spend lots of money..

today.. friday.. meet wq.. go to the sabrina work place. cos we sae we are working for her today to gif out flyers.. first time in my life.. i spent so much time on the bus n mrt.. go eunos from je then after tat go clementi.. cause we are post to clementi.. . k wats so special bout this job.. nothign is so special.. except.. when i reach there.. no one .. told me..stephanie mom and autie were there.. good lor.. n i tok crap.. and even better.. they were just sitting behindme.. listening to wat i was saying... n up till now. i still don noe wat to sae.. anyway.. heck care la.. do i gif a damn !?! .. the truth is i do gif a little .. hahahaha.. quite enjoy that job.. din noe i luv giving out flyers so much.. 2 hrs.. gif out 300++ i think... n its the first time in my life that i smile so much.. hmmm.... no wonder so much ppl take flyer from me..

this 2 days. don noe wats wrong.. i think i seriously need to go and visit the doctor.. firstly.. i seriously think that i gt serious mental problem.. i have been starting to talk lots of thing that i won said normally.. and quite a few ppl have sae that i am crazy.. i don noe y.. maybe the weather too hot ? .. my brain cant take it.. and now it just snap .. and i am crazy.. secondly.. i think .. i am becoming gay.. no !!! I DON WAN TO BE A GAY??!!!!!! who can help me with 10 ways to test if u are a gay and 10 ways to prevent yourself from being gay.. i will reward u.. being gay is scary.. for me at least.. haiz..

hmmm.. sian.. really bored.. been slacking the whole night in front of the com.. don noe wat to do. .. hmm.. don noe why.. seem to start thinking bout lots of thing.. have u all ever wonder.. if someday.. u notice that a person that u like and which u have been toking for bout 2 yrs ? .. is totally not someone that u noe her to be.. how will u feel..
example.. after 2 years.. then u noe that u have totally no idea on how this person behave and how she think.. how will you feel.. i really don noe bout that ... now then i notice.. after 2 yrs.. i don even noe what type of person she is.. what she like.. and wats her view on certain things.. izzit me tat is slow.. or izzit her tat is strange.. i really don know. .

exam is coming and yet.. i am being bother bout all this stuff.. i really don know wats the problem with me.. i really don know.. sometimes i do really hope that a book will drop down form the sky.. and inside.. it will tell me all the solution to each and every possible problems that i will face.. if anyone of you happen to see that book. pls tell me.. i wan to buy.. haiz.. life really sux.. its boring.. full of shit... and also.. directly opposite of wat tat pppl hope for.. i rem my friend once told me.. y must we study 5 days n rest 2 days ? y not study 2 and rest 5 days ?.. life are just like htat it is not fair at all.. bad thing come to me in 90% chances.. while good thigns.. only come with a 10% chances.. its just aint fair... i really don noe wat to sae.. and wat to do.. haiz..

headache.....dizzy.. fan nao.. problems.. sianzz.. bored... troubles... tire.... headache.....dizzy.. fan nao.. problems.. sianzz.. bored... troubles... tire.... headache.....dizzy.. fan nao.. problems.. sianzz.. bored... troubles... tire.... headache.....dizzy.. fan nao.. problems.. sianzz.. bored... troubles... tire.... headache.....dizzy.. fan nao.. problems.. sianzz.. bored... troubles... tire.... headache.....dizzy.. fan nao.. problems.. sianzz.. bored... troubles... tire.... => wat i been feelign this week.. haiz..

-i open my eyes..
only to see the dark side of the world..
i open my hand..
just to grab the lost hope that have fallen on me..
i open my mouth..
just to scream out loud..
i wanna be free..
from this world..
this cage of chaos darkness.. and pain .

2005-08-30T03:13:00.000+08:00

ok.. its.. 317am.. and i have to be in school by 1130 tml and i gt a damn bloody stupid and impt presentation at 130pm.. woo..and i cant slp.. wat the hell man !!!! so i decide to log in and write a new post in this cemetary site.. yes .. its lonely and quiet in the night.. and here i am blogging infront of the com and i off the night.. this is such a typical lonely guy life.. sit infront of the com.. stare at the com.. see ppl sign in sign out of msn.. haiz.. this is so sad man !

i just cant seem to fall aslp.. don noe wats bothering me.. but i noe that something is in my mind that i cant stop thinking of.. and the truth is i don noe wat the hell am i thnking of.. haha.. ok this is so sad.. i cant control what i trying to think and this is killling me.. ok its wq birhtday today.. happy birhtday wq.. seriously speaking.. i hope his dota improve.. we been discussing today.. and really think that there is generation gap.. cos he seem to do alot of thing that we don semm to understand.. maybe thats a typical 1985 mentality.. however i can ensure that spore have a veri potential commando here in my friend.. who will chiong at every opportunity that he have..

k now.. back to mr ow aka uncle agony life.. ok i am really damn afraid and i mean it.. i am afraid that i will become a gay.. wat the rite ?! 1 wk ago i still thinking about tat girl and how to chase her.. and i sitting there thinking bout the last time sec sch thatt girl.. u all shld noe rite.. and now one wk later.. i feel numb.. is this a sign of tire of love.. don trust love.. or izzit i start to get interested in guys. . and i am becoming a gay.. pls help me !! ahhhh !! this is so scary..

hmm .. saw someone online just now.. don noe y.. its not with the courage thing.. just don seem to have to initiative to go n type hi to her.. don noe y.. seem that this few days things is takign a parachute jump (going bad la lk parachute jump down lk tat la) don noe why.. maybe cos i haveing my monthly pms ba. bad mood sae wrong thing .. or izzit really that whole world is getting stress up bout that IP stuff. i hope its ip ba.. hmm.. last few wk she still sms FIRST.. and i swear that for that i so bloody damn happy that i can jump out of my hse 10 times... oh ya tat day.. that cb jy ask me redo spss.. siao one.. i mood damn bad.. but don noe.. someome sae willing to pei wo.. yea it maybe just console.. sae for the sake of saying.. howver i am damn happy.. so gang dong ar.. nearly cry.. hah.. BUT I DIDNT.. ok .. i told myself.. for that.. i willing to do anything for her ba. .maybe thats just me.. wat u do to me.. i will repay.. if u treat me bad.. u will get it.. but sometime i just don noe.. why i just cant seem to express to her what i thnking.. and i just cant seem to understand what she tiniking too..

normally.. we guys take intitative to sms the girl rite.. they will reply.. we be happy.. this can last for few wks.. but sometime.. comfrim .. is we will sian le.. we alway sms.. don noe whether they are just replying or are they really enjoying to us.. so just hope that sometime they can sms us first rite.. but.. then some ppl just cant seem to sms ppl first.. come on.. a simple hello.. gd morning.. really will bright up ppl day wat.. wat with tat stuborness.. aiyoz.. shall not sae too much.. not i wan to think too much or sae alot.. talking n chasing is a girl.. it nd 2 hand to clap.. if only one party sms all the while.. this won go far.. even for a friendship lor.. haiz.. don know how to sae..

now i start to think that its qutie stupid of me.. when ppl sae don lk u.. they mean it.. but then .. it diff to ffan xia... lk or no lk a person.. it take a long time for tat feeling to come or go.. so .. i don noe.. i just cant seem to cant fan xia ba.. i don noe y.. haha.. but bow i really feeling numb bout her.. its so sudden i don noe y.. haha.. but wat i scare if lk alway.. when i am numb.. suddenly she will tok to me or wat so ever.. then the flame and passion ignite again.. don noe y.. i really think this is retribution.. i heard that my dad n grandpa use to flirt around lk no one business.. so i think .. this is karma!!!.. now the girl start to toy around with me and i am going to die as a lonely cow. yea.. this is so sad.. so ppl.. kindly pls.. don flirt.. it will really affect the future of ur children ok.. lalal.. wat shld i sae..

i still cant seem to fall aslp.. i don noe why i am super engertic.. maybe i shld go down.. run round the park.. and run till half.. faint n drop inside the big big canal and die there.. yea.. sometime i really hope i just die tats the truth.. life is just so sickening.. k la.. too long ppl won read.. stop here.. think tml then continue.. uncle agonay miserable life part 2 .

-when the flame and passion is gone..
don ignite it if u have no intetinon of keeping it up
a single action can be interpret in a thousand way
a dream can just go on with a simple thoughts..
giving up is not easy.. forgetting is not simple..
if you have no desire or see no hope in keeping the flame on..
just don ignite it..
just let it go off in the nite..
with the help of the rain drop and cold winds..

2005-08-09T17:07:00.000+08:00

my SG girl
Do u or do u all not agree that we all had the same edu, goes to school together.remember how i used to hold ur lovely tiny hands in kindergarden. we play zero point, five stones (dun know if they are still playing 5 stones), how we ran around the school field playing catching, sucking our hack, how i made u laugh. Dont i amuse u?

Then soon we were skipping school to billards saloon n skating rings. folding stars n hearts placing them in a glass bottle for u. when i Pierced 1 nose rings 5 earings, keeping my aaron kwok hair style just to match u in ur folded school skirt n ur sweet but geeky face. Don't i feel for u?

I was there in the poly driving a little pony, u stay in the north while my den is in the east but fetching u was never a chore to me. never once did i complain. cause having u in my ride, ur lovely morning scent makes me insane. All the late partying mambo nites, all the crazy stunts we pull in the back of the car. Don't i lust for u?

Here we are in the prime of our lives, oh my my..... how u had changed. suddenly the european dick who was serving me dinner in england u lust. after all Ur MBA separates us, our divide mend we must. u have changed while i have not. stiil here with my 5 stones n rubble band rope, waiting ...... waiting... for a friend to come and build a home. Don't i luv u?

SignedSG boy

*saw this on a forum.. think that tis is interesting so i decided to post it up.. ..sg guys not gd meh !! *

2005-08-08T16:06:00.000+08:00

ok .. 1 month since i blog.. time for uncle agony to start complaining bout his life and studies and many many other things..

first i will start off with school life.. this few days.. heard my friend saying he want to quit sch.. and alos lotsa friends being complaining how year 3 sux and how the module is useless to our life.. actually.. i really agree to what they said.. i really doubt that np uses their brain when they are plannign about the schedule and the module to let the students. ask us sell tupperware.. then the stupid company restrict us to so many thing.. some more i really think np shld let us do on the company that we wnt lor. it really sux that they force us to do tupperware and also ask us to do on its beauty product.. come on la.. HAVE U EVER HEARD OF TUPPERWARE SELLING BEAUTY PRODUCTS?! who will dare to to buy.. kaoz.. stupid.. seriously speaking.. i am currently considering quitting the school also.. but then all will start sayingh aiya last yr liao bear with it. but then its because its the last yr. . then i noe bout how stupid the thing i studying is.. so i don think it gt anythign to do with being in the last yr.. bear with it.. i really think i chosen the wrong course or rather,, the wrong specialization.. marketing sux to the core.. SUX !!!!! really hate it.. think thru this few wks.. i shall llook at how things is going then i decide again shall i quit not.

ok now for the future plan.. what to do when i quit? of course in order to listen to the stupid govt.. its NS first.. after i survive the tekong.. next ti think i will not continue with sch stuff.. i will go look for a job or a part time job.. earn up some capital and then save it for my dreams. i want to open a restaurant and of course at the same time.. if the band can really work out.. i don mind venturing into that .. but as far as it goes now.. i think its not that easy.. so i think i will concentrate on the restaurant now.. WHO SAE NO DIPLOMA = NO FUTURE IN SPORE?!.....i reckon that people can do well with a diploma also lor.. ok since tml is national day.. and today is national day eve.. i shall gif the country some face and stop complaining bout hte govt.. but really.. sometime i really doubt the thing that the govt do..

ok now.. after complaining sch stuff.. its time to move on to uncle agony life.. wat can i sae not feeling good this past few wk.. things is starting to look bad and i think that it have never look good before .. maybe its just that i am trying to "an wei" myself.. so i try to make it look good.. i really think that the horoscope thing is true... ITS TOUGH BEINGA CANCER !!!! haiz.. not i wan to think.. u noe rite.. u sit there.. literature student tends to read in btw words.. and tend to follow in that shaky-spear mind...... think n think n think alot.. whether its good or bad.. just think n think..some more i am a cancer plus literature student.. of course think damn alot lor.. diff not to think alot lor..
read that cancer-ian is super insercue bout love also .. that true thought.. how can it be secure unless u heard bout the necessary things rite ?..combining with the over- sensitive nature of the cancer-ian .. its really tough to be a cancer.. u will keep thinking all nite long bout anythign that u see .. u hear.. and u do.. it just sux to be a cancer!

haiz.. now e learning week.. and tats so much shit for us to do.. its worst than having normal lesson .. i just wish that the whole country internet connect go hay wire.. so i no nd to do any e learning lor.. lalalal~ and i think.. this coming week.. shall clarify to the girl ba.. its no use wasting ur time on someone that have no feeling for u rite?.. hmm ..

hmmm.. do u all ever wonder before not.. love is a veri strange thing.. it make u love the person that u hate.. i hate ppl that are insensitive... tok like their are the only one around.. expect u to listen when their are feeling down.. and don gif a damn to u when u are feeling down.. also. .i use to sae.. girl should be gentle.. don scold vulgarities... and i told my self b4.. girls for guys to love n care for .. if i ever meet this type of girls.. i shall gif them a kick on the butt and ask them to wake up .. but now.. i met one.. n i think i have fallen for her.. though she not as bad as all that i have said.. but sometime i really think that.. she is just tat near to all that i have stated.. it really is a strange thing.. imagine.. u hate this person to the core.. but u cant bring urself to hate her ?... or u cant stop feeling sad when u saw ur enemy is crying.. haiz.. seriously.. this don feel gd..

yesterday i watch the stupid 5566 show..there is a part where this girl.. really lk the guy.. but she knew that the guy doesnt lk her at all and only treat her as a sister.. she knew it and of course.. she is sad.. but she still continue to do alot of thing for the guy.. even to the extend that she is willing to help the guy to chase after the girl that he like.. ok.. maybe some of u may think ok la.. lk tat only.. nothign wat.. but then after tat i saw her do something.. that i don noe y.. my tears nearly roll out of my eyes.. this wat she do.. she hug the guy and ask.. "can a sister do this to you ?" and the guy sae yes.. then after that.. she put her head on the guy shoulder and ask.. " can a sister do this " and then she hug the guy arm n ask again .. "can a sister do this ? " of course.. the guy sae yes.. its normal for the sibling to be intimate wat.. but he never notice that that.. the girls eye is red and her tears is rollign down her cheek whenever she hug him.. i really think tis is somethign that alot of us never really think and experiece before.. we can alway sae that.. aiya.. i lk this girl she happy = i am happy .... i don mind if i not the perosn she like.. as long as she is happy.. i am fine with it.. but.. how many of us can really do that .. and feel tat way.. i admit.. i cant.. so i realyl think that part is touching.. u imagine.. u really love him.. but.. the only thing u can do is to help him go after the girl she like.. which is not you.. and next.. u can hug him.. tok to him.. etc but u will noe that u are not the one in his heart.. and watever you do .. he won understand what u are feeling.. this is really sad .. serious.. i nearly cry while watchign it.. while that cb wq.. still can ask me go do e learning on msn .. t(-.-t) u wq..

mabye its because i experience something lk tat.. so i will feel tis way.. or maybe cos i am a cancer-ian.. so i thik alot.. n veri emotion ?.. i don noe.. seriously speaking sometime.. if u like a person .. just sae it out.. and of course.. if u don lk the person.. pls.. stop being so gd to him and try to reject everyting he do to u ... n of course.. tell him again n again till her get it that.. u 2 are impossible to be together.. its better to hurt the person hard during that short time span rather that dragging the thing on and letting him having hope and then crushing it when he is already too deep into his dream..

- i tot i have touch ur heart..
i tot the dream that i have is coming true..
i tot u noe how i feel ..
never did i realize that its only dreams tats i having..
its a dream that is never to come true..
who will noe the things i been thru.
who will noe of the hurt that i have ..
if this the way the world works..
i will rather be prefer to be blink n deaf..
i wan see no more of the word love..
and i wan hear no more of the sweet stories tat others have been thru.

2005-07-08T21:54:00.000+08:00

ok..finally.. i blog !! .. like one month liao izzit.. hmm.. so many ppl complain sae i never blog.. so now i blog le !!.. k la.. so far.. the school life still sux .. the road show just ended this wk on tues la..and seriously speaking.. i think it sux bah..firstly.. not enough time to prepare.. then also.. the item i selling is not that attractive to students lor.. but stun.. still can sold till 1k.. wat the shit lor.. heck la..

k.. so far.. sch past for nearly.. 1 to 2 month already.. but seriously speaking.. i think i cant mix with tb 15.. don noe why.. just cant seem to click with them.. still prefer the tb 29.. test is coming next next wk on tues.. and this sux.. cos so many thing to do.. don noe how to drag time out to revise lor.. so sian.. something .. to sae the truth.. i think NP department head is stupid.. cant they just plan the schedule all tat better meh.. damn stupid.. make my schedule flood lk hell..

today.. go n queue n wanted to get the lin junjie ticket.. but then sian lor.. i din get it.. but my friend get it.. they cut queue.. then they get.. i so guai.. din cut.. and i din get.. so i learn something today.. DON EVER BE A GOOD GUY.. see queue .. just CUT Ar CUT AR CUT!!!...

so far life.. other than studies.. its quite good.. i go inline skate.. learn to skate.. at least .. my life.. more meanignful.. not like last time.. slack n slack n slack...and don noe wat is going on.. tml have soccer match.. long time since i play a match.. getting so excited.. wooo~~~ shake ar shake ar shake.. so excited..

oh ya.. i think i shld apologise to kareen .. wei kareen.. u happen to read this.. sorry ar ~~.. u don noe why la.. but just accept the apologise can le.. hahaha.. ok.. so now.. wat shld i sae.. oh ya.. my birthday is coming!!! .. in case u all lazy ot check i tell u all..its 16 july.. on a sat !!!! wooo~~~ 19 years ago.. its on this day.. that the well known n well liked joker is born.. hahahah.. lalalal~~~so happy~~ i don wan u all to gif me wat present.. don waste money la.. howver.. i think.. just gif me one ferrari.. thats enuff~~ hohoho..

hmm this few wk.. think.. "things" is not getting good.. maybe i just don noe how to touch the heart of a girl bah.. or am i just born that ugly naturally.. that the girl don lk me?hahaah.. ok.. so gt any one have any idea how to make myself look good.. i am willing to listen to !!! especially comment from girls !!! ahahah.. k la.. write till here bah.. veri long le.. think.. next blog is not far away .. ahah.. btw.. i still piss off.. with that throwing item incident.. ROAR !!!!

-i wan to be with u
not as friend..
not as buddy
but as lovers ..
like butterfly flying in the skies..
the wings come in pair..
and thats wat i wish for..
and in the end..
let the butterfly soar high..
without letting the wing split~~

and i wan a butter knife!!!!
P.S this poem is totally meaningless...wahahha

2005-06-10T17:31:00.000+08:00

ok.. long time no blog.. starting off with my complain ! .. complain make me feel better.. so i must complain !! .. ok this week.. june.. is nt a good week for me.. basically.. sch have started and i think that i just cant seem to adapt to my new class and the module that we have. the time sux.. the people here have completely different interest with me and it seem lk that i cant struck a conversation with them. this year.. really damn sux.. the project come lk no nd money.. the due date is damn near.. and my head is damn pain..

those ppl in the another batch.. 1.1 i thik.. is really crazy.. all aiming for AD .. really.. i going mad if this go on.. pia project damn fast.. and everythign they sae is project.. grade and etc... k they are not that really bad.. maybe just that i slack too much.. really stressing me up now.. i must get AD for this.. i must get AD for that.. wah.. HEADACHE !!! .. i am a slacker .. a D grade student.. buay tahan !!! then project must chiong chiong chiong.. wa lau.. i shall not comment.. just make this a case of different view and working method.

ok .. i been seriously thinking about few things this week. first... to get a cca or nt.. i don nd the freaking cCA point.. but i just think that i nd a CCA to make my schedule more fun la.. everyday study all tat.. go home lie there n slack.. damn bored.. go sch see the AD student.. really think i nd a cca.. to make myself busy.. maybe that will make me treasure the life i have more. hope soccer have trial n they accept year 3.. i wan to go for the trial. ..

next.. i am SERIOUSLY thinking about quiiting NP.. i really hate the way things are done and the lousy crappy idiotic system they have. a class gt 2 different batch of IS student.. WTF!!! might as well ask them split class with us .. .. its stupid lor.. the thurs they gt lesson i don have.. i prefer all to have lesson lor.. at least i can noe them better.. then can also come back on thurs n do project.. this is damn crappy.. and the bloody marketing module.. WHOOOSH !!! fantastic.. totally not suitable for me i think.. think i going to die n rot in this module.. i am DETERMINE to be a free rider this sem.. HECK CARE !!!!

i really feel lk quiiting NP.. go NS first.. after that come out.. follow what i really wan to do. i want to be a chef.. but it seem impossible.. too late to go learn cooking.. and too late to apply to that don noe wat place.. for me to learn all the cooking stuff. . next i wanted to form a band n really cut an album.. but think about that.. i cant find some really committed and good friend that form with me.. i find no vocal guitarist and worst of all the DRUMMER.. i cant find.. can find .. also play different thing.. i don noe what to sae.. haiz.. even can form.. its difficult ot make it big.. singaporean is conservative.. any sight of GOTHIC n VISUAL will freak them out.. any violent or bloody words will be censor.. and of course.. what the crappy govt think is not suitable.. also must censor.. this is the same as writting national day song lor.. write osmething gd.. educational.. ok la .. FxxK OFF with that lor.. singapore band industry is not that gd either.. how to strilke it big.. ?? i really don noe.. sometime.. what i really hope is that .. i sleep.. than later heart attack and i die.. no nd to worry also lor.. so many thign to think about.. so many freaking troubles.. and so little time n solution..

- i lied on the bed..
thinking what i could done..
i know i not that good..
i know i not that sociable..
i only know.. those who i love..
will leave me..

2005-05-22T22:37:00.000+08:00

wah..long time no blog.. k la.. finally attachment end.. then school is starting.. first time in my life that i hope school faster start.. cos the work realyl not that nice.. now have to write out a 2000 words report to hand in.. SIAN!!..

k.. new term.. i wish .. same as last feww sem.. relax relax then let me pass alll.. then ar.. now alot of year one freshie.. some at toys r us is coming over.. hope to see them la.. then i check le.. i think my class gt 9 guys.. sian lor.. don noe so many guys for wat... hope more girls la.. cos i wan to be alone no more !!! hahah.. k la k la.. joking la ar..

hmmm.. don noe wat to write le.. think stop here.. school start then i write somemore ar..

2005-05-07T09:37:00.000+08:00

hm...veri long never blog.. cos been hit with the sunday working schedule.. attachment.. actually is useless and crappy lor.. work like a dog.. and getting paid like shit.. hahaha.. hope it end soon.. left 2 weeks only.. haha.. so far.. at there.. Toys r us.. fix bike n fix bike n fixx bike.. all ppl there tell me.. i am suay.. cos i kenna the section most tiring n hectic bla bla bla.. hah.. wat can i do.. but really rubbish la.. all i learn there nthign to do with my studies one.. fixing n changing light bulb... fixing bicycle.. link with business studies? i tdon think so.. maybe i shld change course be electrician better la.. crap !.. hope tis 2 weeks end fast..

this few wk.. download alot of j rock band concert.. like Dir en Grey... reignite my passion for them.. and really think.. i shld go back.. touch my bass.. n form a band.. haha.. at least..i am doing something i like !... nt like the TOYS R US attachment.. the more i work... the more sian i am.. hahah.. anyone want the jrock song ?? i can send !!!.. u wan i sing one.. also can.. i can record.. hahaha.. hmm.. think i be finding some ex band member n my cousin to meet up n jam.. see how it goes.. hope everything go smoothly...

basically..this may month.. sux to the core for me.. scedule is shit.. and i write everything from wat i don lk to wat i think of the attachment in the ITP booklet.. guess wat.. they take my booklet.. let ppl read.. haha.. FANTASTIC... and the person who i don like.. now noe how dulan i am with him !!! no wonder his attitude toward me change.. become better ? hahaha.. maybe shld just let them listen the lindsay lohan or wat... song.. STOP INTRUDING MY PRIVACY!!! haha...
then friday.. 6 may.. my grandma pass away.. she been taking care of me when i was young.. dote on me alot.. and i remember all the thing that she done for me.. however.. over the years..i nt that close to her.. i visit her veri seldom.. ever since she gt stroke... and ever since i was in upper secondary.. i spend time outside .. at home slping.. but i never visit her.. kind of regret.. she use to dote on me.. and yet.. i never really repay her back with wat i can.. sometime.. ppl shld just treasure with what they have around.. said wat u wan .. do wat u can when u are allow.. don wait.. i been tellign myself.. to wait wait wait.. then in the end.. i did nothing n now she is gone..

she's gone... am i sad?.. nt really.. cos i noe.. its a way for her to relieve off the pain.. she used to be active.. and not that thin.. love to cook and play some old ppl sport.. but she gt stroke.. she cant talk.. she cant walk.. and she cant express her self.. i remember.. when her heart stop that time.. we manage to save her back.. but.. her pain .. is just increasing.. now.. she thin.. due to the limitationg of food that she can eat.. and how she look like few years ago.. is totally different with how she look like.. she been hit with virus.. illness.... and lot of thing.. so i think.. to be gone in that way.. peacefully.. is good.. at least.. she is relieve of her pain.. and she go without much struggling n pain.. i pray for her in my heart.. hope she be with my grandpa up there..

the funeral.. will last till tues... finally day that i be able to see her.. till she is to be crement.. nothign i can do now that she will know.. i noe i nt that fillial.. i did not cry during the time when she was gone.... i will just pray..

-if tears can bring u back ..
i will cry for u.....
a river.. a sea..
whatever it take...
i will do it for u...

however.. its not that simple..
wats gone is gone..
i will never forget..
its alway in my mind..
the 19 years that u been with me..
to care and to cry for me..
if i ever have a choice..
i will not let u leave this way..
if i ever have a wish..
i will wish that u are here with me....

in memory of my belove grandma... Mdn Teo Kim Hong. ..

2005-04-13T05:00:00.000+08:00

hahah ... guess wat!.... my site gt a player to play song liao.. i "kop" from others site.. then can play those song i nice.. but may load veri long.. sorry ar ppl.. but if don lk the song.. think its noisy.. off it.. if like.. can play n play n play.. till u happy.. hahah.. its by X Japan.. one of my fav band.. but disband liao..obviously its from japan la.. haha .. wan its video n vcd i can lend u all ar... hahaha....

hmm... now working.. use to it liao.. quite happy working now adays la.. but i work few days only.. then earn veri little.. but i think.. this job.. will change me bah.. now i can look at thing more optimistic.. don noe how to spell.. hahah.. hope work liao.. can temper don so bad la.. hahah.. n ya.. I GT STAFF DISCOUNT FOR TOYS!!!!.. depend on wat toys.. range from 10-35% discount.. hahahah....

k la.. work le.. now.. really think.. i shd be happy with wat i have bah.. last time alway complain.. wa liew no gf.. nvm la.. gt also lk tat.. no have also lk tat.. hmmm.. i am not shuai.. i am fat.. i am bad temper.. i hope i can change la.. though i single n lonely ar.. haha..but i think i shld be happy with at the other thing i have.. at least.. i have good health.. see those 9pm channel 8 show.. realise.. health is impt.. must be happy la.. i gt gd health.. at least.. i able to have 3 meals per day.. have game to play.. those.. i never really thought bout it before.. i alway think i veri suai la.. all that.. but then.. i never notice bout it... sometime.. we should be content with wat i have.. don alway think i am the most suay lor...

hahaha.. wooo~~don shock ar.. the nonsense ow.. said something logical.. think cause work this toys r us bah.. i alway sian.. DON WAN TO work.. but then.. hahah.. life is like that.. happy also lk tat.. unhappy also like that.. so live life happier la.. just smile n smile.. sui bian yi dian lor.. hhahah.. then ar.. y all sae i chasing after ppl.. i never ok.. i equal to all girls.. never really chase who lor.. get it nt.. WILSON TAN.. hmmm.. this type of thing.. yah yah la.. gt then gd.. no have then sua lor.. ahahah.. WO KAN KAI LE!!!!... hahah.. today.. jy come my work place.. quite gd to see someone familiar bah.. hahah.. next time u all coming tell me la.. i will prepare.. if nt i see familiar ppl i will stun ar..hahah..k bah.. next tiem then update la!! so early.. i wan sakae sushi later !!!

-shadows on the wall..
blood on the floor....
tell me.. what shld i do...
paint to me the path i shld take..

2005-04-07T18:42:00.000+08:00

ok...attachment start liao....
first day.. go there briefing whole day.. listen till veri stress n sit till butt pain....
2nd day... which is tues.. my working schedule is 6- closing... tot will be relax.. but man... how wrong can i be... closing part is killer... must put those item back to the shelves la.. those little kid.. take one barbie doll sticker throw on the floor.. i so new to the company.. search till i headache then found it.. then later sweep la.. mop la... suppose to end at 1115.. and gt last bus... but do stun la.. so many thing to do.. straightening all tat.. 1200 am the finish.. take cab home lor.. bo bian then claim...

the third day.. which is thurs.. (wed i off) ... work 10 - 2 only.. 4 hrs.. but must reach by 915 for briefing for morning shift.. listen the don noe wat big shot manager tok lor.. then listen still okie.. then later go back to do my thing.. ask me take play dough la... lego la.. thing transfer from this sarea to that area n arrange.. ok la.. not that bad also.. so the attachment till now still alrite bah.. except for the closing and the freaking long distant travelling i have to make.. then put thing here put thing there....push trolley around la.. help customer... (i so blur... don noe y all still ask me.. do i look that helpful???)... then wah time really past veri fast.. 2 pm liao.. wooo hooo~~~ so happy.. cna go home... then thurs is the last day i working as stated on the schedule.. then i ask the manager.. how to know my next week schedule?... then she sae.. oh.. u haf to work on sat on sun.. if u not on sat.. then sun.. SONG!!....my sat slot empty.. mean i this week must work on sun... all the good mood gone.. sun flood with ppl.. then either full or morning shift.. mean must wake up at 7 and having 50% chance to get back at 12 am... wah lau !!!!... really feel lk throwing the shirt on the floor n sae i quit.. but cannot.. attachment.. for heaven sake.. post me at least to jurong point la.. not so far.. also cannot.. gif me weekend sunday come back work.. damn piss.. i don noe how to react.. i told the other attachment student.. he was like... HUH!?!?!?!?!? SIAN!!!!??? must ar ?!!?... haiz.. so why u gif me break on week day?... still ask me back on SUNDAY...GOLDEN sunday.. so i call the officer.. see can reject sun or post me to jp one nt.. then ...she call the in charge.. they sae cannot.. liew... everyday go forum... i will die.. tot this week finish can enjoy.. no stun... sun must work... haiz... how to react?!!?.. i also don noe.. smile smile n take it as it come lor... now play game no mood .. do thing no mood.. slp till sun n work suan le... sian...

* pls time pass faster... 7 wks of attachmet.. not even one wk pass... PASS FASTER!!!!

-i feel tire.. i feel sad...
i feel fustrated with no one here to understand me..
what can i do ?..
simple.. just smile.. and forget bout all the trouble..
a smile make the world seem bright..
a smile make my worries seem no more.
just smile..
to all the attachment classmate of mine..
just smile.. and 7 weeks will pass by..

2005-04-03T21:36:00.000+08:00

ok..exam just finish yesterday... fell sick for the last paper.. so i just hope i can pass... as for the other 3 paper.. let me pass.. i be happy...but hope om can get better.. and tml i have to go for attachment.. so sian.. nt really rested and now... tml must go work... so far.. at orchard.. hope the environment is good and the supervisor is not those find trouble one...
hmmm...lets see.. yesterday..go out with classmate lor.. eat at far east that sakura ... nt bad la the food... but then once think of attachment starting.. no mood to eat also.. haiz.. so sian.. attachment ..take up our time.. gif little money.. and after that come back year 3.. time really flies.. and we are in a different class.. haiz..TB29!!!!!!

tml first day work... reach by 10.. cannot late.. donnoe can make it nt.. hope it be a relaxing enviroment1!... then that onn mun yan sae will come visit all the ppl.. so shall see if he coming nt.. k la.. overall this whole week...nothing much happen lor.. ya...veri tire only.. study study for test.. not enuff rest then work... tats the overall conclusion for the week...k ba.. tire ..till here stop... see work gt nice thing happen nt.. if i bite any kid.. i will post n let u guys noe!! muhahaha-hahah

2005-03-29T00:54:00.000+08:00

lamer smile..

2005-03-29T00:52:00.000+08:00

lamer smile..

2005-03-29T00:46:00.000+08:00

12 yrs had pass.....from Et elf look alike to a monkey..evolution is amazing...

2005-03-29T00:33:00.000+08:00

lamer face !

2005-03-28T23:22:00.000+08:00

i am a person who tends to fall in love easily...no....i shld sae... who like a person easily.. often.. when someoen is good to me.. i tends to have the wrong impression.. yea.. i know.. its not the other party fault.. its my fault.. why think so much when the other party is only being herself and treated me like anyone else...
since young .. i heard of the chinese saying.. bout how person being too "bu zi liang li" .. in this case.. toad trying to have a taste on the swan.. yea.. i noe.. since we were born.. people are already been fated to be look gd.. look bad.. pretty and so on.. but i alway think that.. thru sheer perseverence.. the toad.. will one day be notice by the swan for his good point.. and hopefully .. accepted by the swan..i alway hope to believe in this .. but in reality... i think this is just a plain fantasy that i alway dreamt off.. yea i agree.. i not the best looking guy in the world.. no nd to sae the world..even in my class.. yea i agree.. wq and aw of course.. is definitly better looking than me.. in terms of character.. i not the best.. i am short temper.. tend to get angry easily.. of course.. aw and jyhave better control of their temper.. i not tat gd at communicating with others.. like them.. they can tok to ppl whom they don noe at will.. i cant.. i only can tok to those who i know them for quite a long time.. yea.. i agree.. i neither gd in looks.. studies.. wealth.. and character..
people have alway been saying.. hey.. if u like a person.. do something about it.. no action and all talk will bring u nothing.. i agree.. but what can i do .. if i tried.. and it still bring no result?.. yah.. trisha had sae.. maybe its not fated for us to be together.. if u are fated.. one slight thing that u do.. she will also be happy and so on.. its true.. i agree with it.. times n times.. i try to gif myself some positive view on the whole matter.. as i noe... its not easy to like a person so much.. and of course..sometime.. girls need time to accept some ppl ..but.. as time pass.. i understand.. hope i gif myself.. is nothing but illusion.. truth its.. the thing is not going in the right way.. maybe its time to let go ...
....i have this feeling b4..twice.. to let go of someone that u like.. its not easy...its not like.. saying it.. and u can achieve it in 3 weeks.. its not tat simple.. i don noe what to do .. and i in a mess in my head.. ya la.. i noe.. ppl sae.. "wa kaoz... exam concentrate on paper !! don think so much on this thing la...." of course..its easy to sae.. if u were in my shoe.. do u think its tat easy to do so.. i try...slp n slp n slp.. but useless.. slp till my limit liao.. and i wake up.. still thinking bout it.. i don noe how to solve.. i don noe how to settle.. most impt.. i don noe how to forget..
i don noe y.. she like to ask me on the sch stuff.. do i look that friendly.. do i look that easy going?.. y people like to ask me help them do thing..but i not angry.. i noe. girl ask u do thing.. u shld do.. don nag.. be a guy.. be a gentleman.. don so petty.. just do .. can help just help.. but i not that good.. i not that type of good person.. i do have my emotional period.. i do have my worries and troubles... i smiling here.. helping u all do the stuf.. but who noe the pain i have in my heart.. who can i share my worries with...? who can i complain all my troubles to ?.... so i blog lor.. blog n blog. let my ah gong read lor.. hope he will ccome tonite.. on my com.. n read it.. then gif me 4 no. to buy toto after taht..
today.. AAA paper.. she ask me .. cos i tell ehr don noe then ask me..so i call n teach her.. but i realise.. how difficult it is to teach her.. alway.. when she sms me or wat.. its bout sch stuff.. about studies thing,... its sad for me.. it feel lk.. i only a classmate.. how i wish the call today.. was to tok on causual thing.. not school work.. i rem once.. i later for lesson she ask me y i late.. i was damn happy.. for the first time.. its not about sch stuff.. n she sms me.. yea.. maybe i easily satified.. but.. nothing feel better than when the person u like.. send u a sms.. yea.. i really wish to tell her.. pls don be nice to me.. or even.. don tok to me too.. if u have no feeling for me.. it just make me hurt more.. but i cant do it.. i noe.. sometime studies she nd help.. i can .. i must help.. so i cant sae tat.. but.. it just make me feel more hurt.. i don noe y..

- no matter how pretty the swan is..
the toad will bored with it..
and eventually gif up...
but.. how long will it take..
how long will it need...
no one noe....

2005-03-20T18:58:00.001+08:00

woo..exam is coming....damn sian..i still haven touch... and the first paper is AAA...wa liew...damn jialat...must start to revise soon..hmm..this time damn sian lor..after exam..is attachment...last paper on sat...attachment on mon...so wonderful.... let me noe who set all this..i promise his/her hse sure kenna burn by fire... hmm... some more..last time exam finish is holidays...holidays come back..all same classmate...not so cham..now no holidays...still ok..but come back...gif u new class...new classmate....wah kaoz...immediately sian three quarter... so sian...y must change the damn class..so ma fan..must take time to know new friend also..HAIZ!!!!! wa liew..imaging..come backk no more old tb29 friend..sian lor...nd time to gel with new friend..somemore yr 3 all is big big project..where gt time to gel n do project lk last tiem tat effective....kaoz..sometime..really think spore govt must go think bout us...song then timetable ka lim bei anyhow pull forward...donnoe wat they thinking...must be some student go scratch their car..they not happy....after yr 3..NS... wah..think liao sian half... haiz... really sux la... no life..machiam thing all is being plan by others...no freedom... so ppl....5 yrs down the road..when i come out to be a candidate for MOE head..pls vote for me..i shall make ur life better... haiz.. .thats all la..gt new thign then i shall post ar... wahahah...

*btw...all the ppl ...post the go bugis trip..so i must sae abit.. ok la..tat day..i nd to pass thing to stephanie sis la..so drag them go.. thhanks to them la.. i manage to reach home alive.. hmmm...then first time in my life drink starbuck coffee... nt bad qutie nice.. but the cake is a killer... $5.. stun.. btw.. t all gt read this post ar..next thur..wan to ask for AAA remedial nt!! then after that go eat pastamania... ON BOR!!! especially JY..settle the AAA thing leh!!

2005-03-11T17:06:00.000+08:00

the 4 guys of TB29~!!!!! (anwen roger weiqi and junyang...L to R)

2005-03-10T22:58:00.000+08:00

Wah lau.. this is me…. Typing second time lor..write so long.. serve ki siao.. all gone… hmmm..ok…from the pic can see la.. the hair… veri ugly n funny… but I think not ugly la… is FUNNY only… (let me console myself can ?)….somemore tml gt presentation…. Must wear formal.. cham liao… Mohawk n formal…it’s the joke of the season….
So fast..tml last lesson le…its going to be the last time tb29 in a class having tutorial.. quite sad neh… although..with them sometime gt conflict n nt happy la.. but also 2 yrs le… gt feeling liao… hmmmm ….weiqi junyang anwen… all different class will sian leh… no wq n aw disturb jy… nt use to it… though sometime really wanna gif them each a bomb n let them die la… but really will miss them.. always together tok so much crap thing… then the girls…shi hui.. tricia… rainus… janessa maz… all this… will miss them… always also veri funny one.. especiall the rainus… sometime really will suddenly crazy one lor… haiz… then all the girl..different class…wah sian.. think np only TB29 gt girls lk tat lor.. so funny easy going and so full of crap lk the guys… hahahah.. whole tb 29.. though the joen they all I tok little.. but then they also actually is quite sui bian one lor.. u tok to them.. they tok to u.. and really.. the whole class people is veri funny …hahah.. the lastly come to the ph n Stephanie!!!!….hahah..marathon runner lai de… class end…10 seconds… and they are gone,… the ph n Stephanie.. always veri quiet.. but once u sit infront them.. u will noe la.. they 2.. keep toking n laughing wan,… very strange one.. hahah..then wats more ar… oh ya.. no more stephanie in the same class… everyday ar.. will be rainy day.. she smile so cute…hahaha.. cannot see le~~ so sad ~~hahahah.. really hope those chose marketing one ar…COME TO SAME CALSS AS ME!!!!!!
Tml….ecd presentation.. hope all ppl get gd grades ah…cos the stupid ecd tutor.. really is shit la… mark so strict… teach so sux… tok also sux… NT GD one… maybe cause …I bias la.. but I really don lk her lor….
Ytd ar… go to plaza singapura.. celebrate… loy chuan yong go army.. gif him farewell.. the thing lk cock up.. some here some there… veri sian.. but in the end… veri funny la.. we all.. site at the lousy wat pizza café… drink fruit juice.. hahaha.. ordeer ice cream with coffee.. gif me coffee nia.. then collect ice cream coffee money from me…$4.90…quite ex la.. then the coffee also nt nice.. my hse there kopitiam.. also nicer lor.. then we sit there tok a lot of thing… rem the sec sch time… so funny… hahah time really flies.. so fast…one by one go NS liao.. soon its gonna be me ar… hahaha
Oh..i change something on the blog.. and the song.. hope u all like the song.. this song ar.. I online heard it..think quite nice.. so save it lor. Pls.. I didn’t download.. I save it ok!!! I was surfing site la.. then accidentally came across it… hahaha.. some more the whole thing so funny…. In the most strange circumstances …found this song…hahaha…think its call white Christmas bah.. cos I save it..it put…3.mp3.. so I don noe.. but the girl keep saying white Christmas.. so I guess so bah,,
Ok la.. write a lot.. must save some to write next time… hahah..till here stop bah~~ bb~~~ good luck tml ar~~ TB 29 GO GO GO!!

*P.S. hmmm..oei … long time no ppl tag.. veri sad de leh.. tag ppl tag!!! Hahahaha….eh …. If gt tb29 here see this hor.. tml aw will ask bout the last gathering thing next week… really hope all can go lor… cos last le…bye bye~

2005-03-10T20:29:00.000+08:00

WHY!!!!!! UGLY HAIR!!! WHY!!! LK TAT!!!

2005-03-03T22:42:00.000+08:00

this sat....chuan yong meeting us to eat dinner together.. to celebrate his NS admission... hahah.so who wan come.. TELL ME!!!.. i super happy today !! cos i go watch howl the moving castle!!! hahah..watch is watch la... the thing is..hahahaha don wan to sae.. not many ppl noe y also.. but i noe can liao !! HAPPY !!! ECD DIE !!! stupid project... make all the class piss off... y cant the TUTOR BE MORE easy going n cre8 less trouble 1!!! holiday is coming so i exam... wish all study hard hard la... get gd grade... then gd... haiz.. but the class splitting up liao leh.. bit sian.. must take time go noe new friend... sian lor.. haiz... hmmm.. n then... tats all so far.. conclusion is I AM VERY HAPPY TODAY !!!! WOOOO~~!!!!

2005-02-08T13:01:00.000+08:00

ok..today is chinese new yr eve..and i am going back to malaysia to eat my reunion dinner... hmmm so i shall blog before i am away from malaysia for a long time..

first... TEST IS OVER !!!! YEA YEA YEA!!!!!! finally lor..abit confident on some of the paper..but then..still hope i pass all at leasT!!!! hahaha.. hmmm WISH ALL PEOPLE GD LUCK FOR THEIR MARKS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! hahaha...

this few days...veri sian lor...not boring that sian..but alot fan nao..then u will sian that sian... veri irritated too lor...first is the common test...one more is other thing..sometime hor..really veri jialat one...now i finally understand the term "woman heart....a needle in the sea" in chinese... really don noe how a girl think lor... machiam their brain is lk a maze.... think thing..so luan...so chim...can guess one lor...haiz... if gt girls happen to read this ar... TELL ME HOW U ALL THINK ONE LEH !!!! ....veri sian... sms her ar..try to hint hint her... wa liew..don noe is act blur or wat.... sae don noe... i really think those people who haf girlfriend is li hai.. at least they noe wat they are thinking and manage to get into their heart....k la...chinese new yr must be happy.. write till here stop !!! Muhahaha..if nt later chinese new yr all read le will sad ar..hahah..

-我在你心中只不过是个傻瓜..
一个毫不起眼没有地位的傻瓜..
然而你又可知道..你在我心中占有多大的地位..
我愿为你挡风遮雨..分享痛苦.
可是你却依然对我视而不见..
把我当着是一个无聊的傻瓜...

2005-02-06T23:31:00.000+08:00

the E-Commerce e learning assignment is to ask us to make a blog and comment on the module...if we have a blog already ... we can just post a comment on our blog...so now..i am going to post a comment

i think that e commerce has help people to save time and money on buying thigns as it allow us to surf the net and get wat we want. i think it is a very useful invention for the world and mankind. as regarding to the module.. i think i have learn quite a lot of thing from it like how to use dream weaver software. but i really do hate the module sometime as it really is driving me nuts. as we all know ...the computer stuff is very sensitive to the command type in and really... it really make me wanna burn the textbook at time and just give up. so i really hope that the module will be easier by giving us more specific information and more FAQ pages for us to post our comment. i think i have become more optismistic and more tolerable toward things after taking the module. as it really give me fustration and really takign the module help me to train my patient....

2005-01-26T23:17:00.000+08:00

common test coming....now then i noe....marketing so many stupid thing to copy down...must revise and revise and revise..so sian...after common test .. gt project !!!!!...wah lau..NP is gila or wat..the schedule so pack...BUAY TAHAN !!!!!! ....after test gt project..after project test again... this year..chinese new year.. don noe how to survive also lor..last time will ask ppl out go visit hse...take hongbao..this year....i never die at home shld be lucky..haiz.... that day go buy new year clothing..saw also ppl....saw the ....i don noe how ot spell the name...madelenge or wat...they call her mad la..the 4/2 that phong enyi...yah...hmmm...time really flies lor... suddenly ppl all gt GF la..BF la... then ppl start going in to NS...don noe how to imagine...chin wei in NS.... suddenly all the friend lk disappear ..hide in tekong or wat...soon its gonna be me... hmmmm... 18 yrs...kust glide pass lk tat... rem last tiem..alway complain o lvl so long la... all this all tat...now suddenly...leaev sec sch...2~3 yrs le... all ppl start going to ns...... cannot imagine..one day..suddenly..ppl start to get marry la.. all tat...haiz...this sem..gt attachment !!! ..do anyone noe whether attachment can be pom ?!?! hahahaha... ok la...write till here le ba la.... go "study" n play my game...

** justin u gt see my blog..zhun bor !!! thanks ar !!! kick soccer must come.. cos i wan to ole u !! hahaha

2005-01-14T01:03:00.000+08:00

first post of the year 2005... don noe know y...tis few month... mood alway very bad... don noe why.maybe cause time pass...seen some ppl true face la ar...damn piss off....piss off..also don noe what to do also...very fustrated...

i super unhappy lopr..tot my poly class...is very fun all tat...but time pass... i get more piss off with some of them and some of the thing they do...maybe cause i change le or wat...but don know why..the longer the time pass...the more difficult i feel that it was for me to mix with them...especially the guys....they love clubbing all tat...but then difficult to mix lor..they like tok bout girls all those thing...ok la..i am normal also... also gt see girls...but i don like to sae n sae n sae...then they like...how leh...classmate..cant mix also must mix.....but difficult lor...

HOW!!! who can tell me how!!!! ...now then i noe ar... sec sch friend still better lor... mix better with them ... be with them more happy also.. now almost everyday go sch i also veri sian..veri damn sian....WHAT TO DO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

next time then blog liao...write some more will scream...ok la...mq.. i blog liao la.... blog machiam only u come see nia.. DAMN DISAPPOINTED!

2004-12-20T20:25:00.000+08:00

whoa!!!!! long time no post !!!!! hahaha..no one read also la..so if gt people read..pls tag n tell me hor...i think today i in sch i saw mq.....-.- ...she really change damn lot sia...lk alway saw her different one...ahahha..btw ..MQ if u saw this....i gt somethign to tell u..ur friends...gt some nt bad leh..intro me leh~~ lonely leh me~~....hahaha

now adays...keep listening to the sudeki da ne...so nice..listen n listen n listen..will sian la...but so long haven sian... listen liao can cry..see the translation..then relate to the game... even more feel lk crying..however..the ff9 one melodies of life also nt bad sia...wahahah...who wan!!! i send u !!! if i free...haah FINAL FANTASY SONG IS NICE!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHOA!!!!!! ahahahahah....

new term start...so stress....gt ACCOUNTING...who accounting gd..can teach me..i will repay u kindly...wahahah.. i gif u free ow companion for 3 mths... hahah...so far..the lect...all so sian one..tutors worst...all DAMN SIAN! except for the AAA tutor ... gentle one..think can go in n bully her...wahahahahah... hmm ok la... write quite alot le..blog again next time !!!!

BTW...sudeki da ne mean isnt it beautiful..wahahahah

-sudeki da ne ? to be embrace in the hug of love
sudeki da ne ? to be with ur love one..
travel thru the times...break thru the barriers...
just to be with her...
death is not an issuse..
for love is there...

2004-11-17T21:32:00.000+08:00

wah...one month le...wahahaha...now then i blog...hohoho....hmmso what should i write?...this few weeks....holiday le..result out le..i pass all!!! so happy..hahaha...then i been slacking at home for this few weeks...nothing to do..then just go bought a new pair of street soccer shoe...wahahha..then i pierce my ear !!! muahahahahah!!!! but too bad la...no time ot go buy some stud to put or what its call...hmmmm...pierce three weeks le..wan to take out also cant...so sian....don noe y they go put till so tight..ok la..i post le..see how long it take for me to post again!!! wahhaha

2004-10-12T23:28:00.000+08:00

exam coming...haven revise..so stress....
just now took out the x japan vcd n watch...saw how they play...heard those song..weekend..scars..endless rain... few months never listen to the song le..but don noe y...it still sound veri familiar to me... saw the way they play...i remember how last time vincent chinwei onn ben shiyuan and me jam together... alway go jamming room and jam..alway tok about how we are going to play like them and be like them... i can still rem the funny stuff that vin used to do...it just seem to happen only few days ago...
donnoe y..everytime i think of the jamming stuff.. feel so strange..still rem the band name..de'zex..alway in class will tok bout it...now..no more le.. hw much i hope it still exist...
vin on drum...ben n onn on guitar...chinwei on piano..me on bass...and shiyuan singing away.... weekend..endless rain...the 2 songs that we alway practice on... rem how vin use to ask me to learn die en grey song..and i will complain..how onn will blast his amplifier...hw ben sit onside and play punk rock..and chinwei sit one side and look at the keyboard...shiyuan..will be there saying wat song he wanna sing..and how difficult for him to hit kyo tone..haha...its all so funny... how i wish one day...de'zex regroup back.. and the 6 of us...be happily playing the song away....

-dreams that we use to share..
path that we use to walk...
will it ever be back...
can i turn back time..
can i remove the sorrow...the tears...and the pain?
will the great old time ever be back ...

2004-10-08T17:47:00.000+08:00

hmmm..so long never post le la ar...now let me see..can post wat....exam coming lor~~~ 16 october.... next sat...so $#%$#@ ....so fast exam..haiz... all hte subject i like sure fail la ar..
H-A-P-P-Y sia... don noe what to do... lets see... mean i must revise now lor..but don feel like moving to revise also...don noe wat to do ....

this few day...at home...keep eating n eating... think i hitting moses lim standard soon...so bored... now i post le hor...HOPEFULLY...someone don complain la..i noe i impt to u all..i never post u all will sad... but really don noe wat to post mah...hahahhaah

tml...going NTU to kick soccer... don noe this life gt chance to go ntu study nt..so tml must grab the chance...go ntu n see the place..touch the pillar...walk on the path... at least i gt a chance to go there la ar... hahaahha...hey ppl..i bery bored leh~~ intro some female friends to me la ar~~
hahahaha... jking la... ok la..stop le.. hand pain head pain butt pain back pain....hohoho...

-rainbow of darkness...fill my heart with hate..
stars in the morning... drain my blood away...

2004-09-19T22:17:00.000+08:00

">

hahahahah..tried to post a pic ar..don noe can succeed ot nt...hahah..if lucky lucky...can ar...see le..i noe the pic not nice la....but u all see le..don scream la...but if unlucky cannot..then too bad lor... today play soccer match..help my friend team play..lose 3-1 la...sad lor...then now my left side body no strength no feeling...numb lk tat...think paralyzed le...seriously thinking of quit playing soccer for other people...then form my own team..lk tat more fun..all the ex-jss one...can play together...cma test one tues...my 70 mks....now revise..lk can do..but later..tutor do stun..gif siao qn... i think i will sit there n T_T..... hahaha ok la..cant type le..hand no strength....bye bye for now~

2004-09-18T21:20:00.000+08:00

give back my result....5 subject..fail 2...still gt 33/100...WAH BIANG!!!! this time sure die..now second test..must get 70 mks then can pass...HAPPY ....haiz... so let me see...xiao mei sae i never up date so i up date now lor...now don up date...maybe forever no need update liao. Next week the presentation and test..come like no need $$ like that...one week 4 presentation...still spread over till one day one presentation....Ngee ann is really siao liao lor...haiz...........
tuesday gt CMA test...now i still nuthing ...so happy..sure die le this semester...hmmmm..this few days...project project....test test...no time ot rest also..wan to rest also guilty...don noe how also lor...somemore everytime at ALONE in house ar....so lonely....
Finally can put music into my spot...at least i gt something to be happy..
BTW..this song is Tears by xjapan...which already disband already...so sad...nothing good seem to last forever...WAT IS THIS MAN!!!! happiness alway last for a short period of time..hope one day..i can change the world la ar...make until all people veri happy..then i also will be veri happy..

2004-08-29T19:51:00.000+08:00

last time i post...olympic just started....now i post..olympic finishing....haiz...time fly so fast...finally..COMMON TEST FINISH!!!! happy leh.but i think ar.. i will fail alot la.....so sian...PISS OFF MAN !!!!.. so bored..so many troubles..so much fan nao...what to do~~ what to do ~~~ tml wq birhtday ar...nvm..act blur la..let him sad...he sad i more happy....

2004-08-12T22:45:00.000+08:00

whoa...now then i notice ..i so long never update. Hmmmm..so what should i write....olympic is coming....EURO2004 just pass...and then...MY BLOODY EXAM Coming!!!!! hmm..don noe whos the dumb ass who told me that poly life was relaxing...SO STRESSS !!!!! can kill people sia....so time pass so fast...don noe y..suddenly..i become year 2..times really fly so fast....hmm..my friends going to ns...and i still here struggling against the books...haiz.....

-to listen to the song of nature is heavenly..
to listen to the singing of the birds is also heavenly..
but to listen the singing of one..it is hell-ish...

2004-06-27T02:22:00.000+08:00

haiz...don know still gt how many people read this blogspot la..hahaha..don care la..now inspiration all lost...cos euro4005 ...watch eat drink sleep soccer only...2 more days..and its school reopen day...hmmm..ok la...not too bad also...cos gt people come np...if gt chance maybe i don haf to go home alone at time also...hahahah.. some more some more...must take chances liao...don wan to be monk....no single no single...lk wat weiqi sae la..grab the bloody darn chances before they slip..hahaha...ok ok ....holland - sweden starting..gonna catch zlatan ibrahimovic do stun.... GO GO GO HOLLAND!!!!

-look at the sky when you are down..
see how bright the moon shine for u tonite...
whenever u are feeling sad...
i will be there for u..
lk the light u be searching in the dark..
i shall light the path for u ..
to gif u warmth when u need it...
and to slap u when it is needed....

2004-06-14T21:14:00.000+08:00

LONG TIME NO BLOG!!!! ahahahah...hmmm EURO 2004 start....and england lose...spain win....france win..bla bla bla....at least gt soccer to watch..better than nothing to do ar....hmmm school starting in 2 weeks time....seem so fast....whoa..chosen my IS...taken spanish..i can see my future in spain..sitting on the commentator seat and reporting spanish primera liga! whoa! ahahahahah.....yesterday have soccer match..draw 2-2 ...now then i noe....soccer match n life is just so unpredictable.... u can just score in the last min...just like life...unexpected thing love to pop up every now and then! so we can we do?...SIMPLE! hang on and try to get over it!!!! wahhahahahahaha...i am going to dye my hair blue during national day!! YEA YEA YEA!!!!

-life is like the soccer ball...
round and keps moving..
no matter how bad the surface is..
it will just keep go on...
although there will be obstacle....
but it will not stop the ball from rolling..
there maybe a few bump...
but it will just keep going on..
no matter how tough life is..
we must keep ROLLING!!!
like the limp biscuit song...
ROLLING ROLLING ROLLING ROLLLING!!!!
ROLL AND ROLL !!!!

2004-05-31T00:17:00.000+08:00

BORING BORING BORING!!!!!!!!!! nothing to do....slack n slack..then i noe tat i veri long no update liao..haiz...so ad update no use..MEI REN KAN!hahaha ...so sad sia!.....but nvm la..continue write...hmm
today so bloody dummy shitty unhappy...play match..opponent never come...hum bird bird..run off...waste our time...then go eat burger king...burger on top tat bread also can drop on floor.....$%#@$#!$!#...my whopper....wah kaoz....today must be unlucky day...
now no soccer to watch..no soccer to kick..no people to disturb...BORING!...get back result ar..so happy...ALL PASS>..enuff liao lor~~~ don retain mi la..i wan to faster go serve the country..so don delay mi n kill my mood!

-the rainbow of hopes bring smiles to ur face..
the smiles on ur face ..bring happiness to my heart..
no matter how tough the road is..
i will remember ur smile..
for it bring mi hopes and new energy..
to conquer all that stand in my way..

2004-05-24T01:17:00.000+08:00

hmm..watch the FA cup final...boring...no upset...hmmm....nowaday..its so boring...
life is always lk tat...when there is school....we always wish for holiday to come...wish n wish n wish...then finally..exam all finish...then we noe that holiday is so boring..gt NOTHING to do at all...everyday..sit infront of the come...from 2 pm to 3 am.....also never do anything.....slp n slp n slp...until 2 pm..wake up...its the same..like nothing has change like tat...

WHAT IS THISS!!!!!! hAIZ!!!......now...worry for exam result...like same like last time...slp slp slp then worry for result...still cant figure out what i can do ..
some of my friend join camps..some working....at least their time is occupy....better than mine....haiz!!!! SO boRInG! so i blog lor!
hope tml will be a better day..

-whenever i think of u..
i felt a sharp pain in my heart...
hoping that u will be my side..
wishing that u be here with mi...

whenever i look up the sky...
i will thinking of the times we have..
just like the cloud....
the time we haf..
are just as simple as it...
slowly... and slowly...
time shall pass...
and true feeling will be noe...

how can i tell u ?
how shall i tell u ?
about the thing i dream that will happen...
ur action...
show no concern for mi..
and your words...show no feeling for me...

i try to do this to you..
but i cant...
i cant bear hurting u ...
i don bear seeing ur tears roll down ur cheeks...

my words to u..
seem useless..
my care for u..
had no reply..
what u expect mi to do ?..
what u wan me to sae...?
i had enuff...
i won believe in anymore lies...

2004-05-16T00:33:00.000+08:00

arsenal win the EPL championship and without getting beaten by any team..whoa..wat a season for EPL....hmmmm..now EP{ end..look like i will save the time n do wat i should do...which is practicing my bass....hmm so boring..holiday seem short....haiz..tml ..no no..later gt a soccer match..and after tat have to go to junyang chalet...can meet some old friend..maybe nt that bad after all....

-in my heart...
there is a hole...
a hole..created by the impact of the things u said..
i try to believe that u are the one...
i try to convince myself that ..
u are angel that i been searching for...
and you are the oasis that i been searching in the dessert...

i try to wait....
i try to tolerate...
just because i noe true love will come one day...
days after days...
rain after rain..
i been waiting...
standing alone n fighting the cold..
just to see u smile..
but to no avail..
all u gif..
is just a word...
"hm?"..

how shall i react..
what shall i do...
i donnoe...
i can only stand there..
and feel my tears rolling down...

2004-05-10T00:07:00.000+08:00

finally finish my exam...and finally gt time to post new thing...what can i sae...life..is nothing more than troubles...just lk a highway...accidents happen almost everyday and this is wat i experiencing in this highway call life..however...lucky gt someone to acc mi thru this period..although she does nt solve my problem for mi...at least..there is someone i can talk to....

-i see nothing infront of this nitemare...
no way out ..no place to hide..
i shouted for help...
but there is no reply...
who can help mi thru ..
who can stop the sadistic desire that is taking over me..
who can stop the tears that is taking over my sight...

i stop shouting..
for i had seen it thru..
no help is there..
hopeless as life it is...
i give up...
i shall let my tears flow..
till the very end that it shall flow..
for this is the last time tears will come from mi..
blood shall replace tears....
and desire shall replace hopes...
till the days...
the flower name love..
really blossom in my heart..
and the angels with the darken wings...
will guide mi thru this place call dream...

2004-04-30T02:14:00.000+08:00

Not being in the best of mood this few day..why is this so?.. maybe of the weather?...maybe of some other incident?..i really don noe.... exam started..just clear bstats...micro next...hope to pass it....

-the most hurtful thing that can happen..is to see the love one...left you right in front of ur eye...

-i walk thru the path of lights...
searching for an answer..
but to no avail..
i wander thru the path of darkness...
looking to be save...
but no one was there...
where should i go ...
what should i do?...
i started screaming...
till my voice was gone
till blood fill my vision..
angel of light..
can hear my anguish?..
can u fill my eyes with tears?...
angel of darkness...
can u stop this madness....?..
..who can stop this madness..
i need an answer...

2004-04-27T00:36:00.000+08:00

- life is like the sky ..
with only blue and white..
simple it may sound..
but unpredictable it cab be..
a sudden downpour of tears..
may make us end our life...
but fear not my friend..
as rainbow appear after rain..
colourful and beautiful it is..
adding surprise and love to our life..

snowing it might be...
but warmth is never loss...
for the sun that our heart need..
is alway somewhere there...

but deep in my heart...
i know...my sun is gone...
for what i feel is cold..
no matter what weather it might be...

2004-04-26T01:26:00.000+08:00

hmm..so now...arsenal..the team i support...is the EPL champion!!! hha...don noe y..also not very happy or what...maybe because i just not a die hard fan...hmmm..nah...don really care....ahaha...so bored...

-happiness is what all people are looking for....but do it really exist ?..
people are alway trying to be avoid been hurt...but is it possible?..
reality is nothing except the cruel and harsh...but can we try to make it better....is it possible?...
what we do...can affect others...but is it possible that we know that are we hurting someone?...
the only answer to all this..is to ask....to get the reply...
if we don ask..nthing will ever change....
tears will just keep flowing...
hearts will just keep breaking...
and conflicts..will just keep continuing....

2004-04-25T00:24:00.000+08:00

ytd...suddenly gt some inspiration of a new song..get the tune out...hmm..but too bad ..my singing sux..so cant figure out wat i trying to sing....ahah...

-深红色的指甲。。。刮伤了我脸颊。。
双眼不停流下鲜红泪血。。
心里的痛。。没人能懂。。
唯有挥着黑色翅膀的天使。。能够带我逃离一切。。

2004-04-24T01:57:00.000+08:00

hmmmm....i think...just a couple of days more...shall tell my friends bout this blog....myself...wanted to get some rough idea and feed back..and of course..to share my thoughts with the ppl!

2004-04-24T00:12:00.000+08:00

hmmm...its late now...no no..its early now...haiz..feel so ..bored....nothing to do..and i don feel like revising..though i know the exam is coming..but just don feel like revising.....hmmm...so far..only some of my sec sch friend knew about this place..hmm.why dont i wan to tell people bout here?...the reason is simple..cause..,like what i said..wish here will be a "secret" place..eh...a nice nice secretive place...where not many people know ..ahahah...hmm..lets see..so far ..only...justin..yiwen...caiping...tricia...xiao mei knew bout this place..cause i told them bout it..ahahaha...hmmm...seem like writing a diary!!!!!!....nah....must also put some thing i though of myself...lk that then gt meaning..wahahaha....

-this not the first time i been cheated..this is also not the first time i been hurt.....but the main problem is..this is the time..where i really feel the impact the most.....the scar of this wound run deep.....so deep that...it will never be heal......

2004-04-23T19:07:00.000+08:00

whoa..rain so big today..nevertheless..still play in the rain..make mi think of the sinchi Fc incident..so just pack up and stop playing early.......

-i stand alone in the rain.....no matter how hard the rain is...no matter how cold the wind is...i will not be afraid...for the warmth of my dearest love will help me withstand all..and i believe...true love..will fear no obstacles...

2004-04-23T10:59:00.000+08:00

just wake up at 10am lk that...hmmm..on the com..and make some changes to the site...feeling so bored....haiz...now is 10.53am..bet that some of my classmate are at NP..busy doing the bstats ...*guilty*..never go..haha..but no choice....later gt soccer ..then somemore..maybe got some band stuff to finalized all that..so what can i sae?..wish those at the class all the best in completing the works..hahahaha...hmmmseem like this few days..will be trying to update as much as possible..then later on..i will stop..wahahahah..typical ow style....seem like it will rain over here..PLS DON!!! i wan to kick soccer!!! gonna start revision soon then ...ahahah..don wan to retain...yo ho!

-wounds can be easily heal...but the scars...will alway remain......and will never fade..

2004-04-23T03:20:00.000+08:00

haiz..what shld i sae...finish this site...already been force to gif the name to some one...hahaha...FORCE me to gif..if nt she nt going to talk to mi..fine..lk wat she like to said WATEVER!..hahah...if only so many people ask mi for it..i will be rather happy though...hahahaha..but hope those who come in..those spread the site...cause i wanna keep this place a secret...my secrest base...secrest paradise...a place..where i can said post think and do what i like...a place..where i can rest peacefully....

2004-04-23T02:52:00.000+08:00

i finally...complete my blog..hmm.shld i let my friend noe bout it?..so they can visit..or shall i keep this a secret..if they noe i will be embarass...hahahahaha..but i really glad that i completed this..took mi several days....haha..working on my own..later then i noe that..i can dl it..hahahaha...-.-...haha ..first.. i wan to thank yiwen...thanks girl!! u help mi out ALOT...keep pestering u on how to do this..yet u still help mi thanks alot!!..ahah..of coz..still gt soo eng... poh siew ..cai ping all these ppl...ALSO..weiqi...haha..answer my qn also...thanks to shi hui ..ur support..steohanie too..hahah..whoa..sound lk...the grammy!...hahah..nevertheless..thanks to u all..haha..hope ppl will lk this site..IF they knew about it..hahaha...hmm..that all then..yea...

2004-04-23T02:29:00.000+08:00

finally..i have a place to put those idea i gt in mind....hmmthis place..will be where i put all the thing i had though of..i been thinking of..and wat i planning to do..some things..u all see...misght be shocking to u all..cos..it don seem to come out from my mind...ahahah...hmmmso ppl..if u been here..i will be glad ..for spending ur precious time here...and for those..who find it bored....sorry though..but i not going to stop this......